Dreams Dilemma

I’ve been thinking this for the past 2 days. I don’t know why it always keeps pushing me to make the best and wondrous decision for my future path freely without any regret. I know this is so much important and I must think and do it quickly. I am not young but not too old, yeah! My friends always thought that I was so enthusiastic about all things and they also thought I never have self-esteem to make me to stick with any of it. I always am the person who loves to do everything in making my life full of joys and memorable. People would say it like some kind of a prolific person or maybe I am too ambitious, am I not?

Since I was school I love singing, so it started everything since that, mostly in art and creative interest. I developed so many of my interest and change it to become a dream and hope sooner it really work out. Hopefully. Some of it maybe had reached the goal. Singing was my truly enthusiasm and passionately do everything to achieve it. Singing career was started when I was 10 years old which I was in a choir group at school. Madam Razana Zhuhairah was the person who brings me to the group. Impressively, that time my school was a champion for 2 years in a row during my involvement. It was a great experience of all time and I still remembered until now.

At high school, I had developed my inner potential to the limit. Not so high actually just wanted to make people see what I am capable of. I am just ordinary student nothing special about me anyway. That’s why I am so prolific, maybe? I love doing what I love to do to challenge myself but the singing career was ended up at high school. No-lah, I am still singing but only at my resident area, look up for opportunity and gain some singing experience as much as will help to improve my voice vocally. Nevertheless, I had found other inner talent such as acting and poetry but I wasn’t a shining star at school because sometimes I wasn’t so competitive compare to other student.

When I was 16, I know I love to design and very much to love interior design. I also found out that I love advertising because had seen so much Yasmin Ahmad’s TV commercial. Mostly for Petronas portfolio which is that fulls of awareness and touched most of the Malaysians heart instead the storytelling so melodramatic and inspiring. So I set up my goal, I wanted to be in an advertising career. So I did apply at UiTM. Faculty of Communication and Media Studies was my first choice and Faculty of Architecture was my second choice.

By mid 2003, I got an interview calling for Diploma in Interior Design. Too bad my mum wasn’t give me full support for furthered my study so I decided to entered Form 6 which become so famous that time. Everybody was like wanted to get in. During my Lower 6 and Upper 6 I was active in singing. So singing career right back on track and new interest just came around which is in traditional dancing. Not so good in dancing so I had hired as a Manager for the group and so much achievement had we gain during the good old days. However I still gain some traditional dance skills.

After all, I had decided that enough study, its working time! So it took a year I worked as a Front Office Assistant at one of the resort in PD formerly known as Ancasa Resort Allsuites and now known as Ancasa Spa and Resort. It was such a great experience and full of fun and enjoyment worked there. I had learned how to deal and communicate with various types of people with million of behaviours. Furthermore, I had learned PR skills and that make me wanted to further study because I thought I was still at young age and have desired to grab oppurtunity for my future career.

I had applied back to entered UiTM, this time Faculty Communication and Media Studies wasn’t the first choice but was in third. I got the interview calling. So I went to UiTM Lendu, Malacca for an interview and I was like so nerdy. During the interview, I told the interviewer that I love art and creative because they did asked me about my curriculum activity. They told me that I took wrong choice of course to pursue study and afraid if I didn’t get through, so they did give me the dean of Faculty of Artistic and Creative Art’s office number, Associate Professor Dr Hatta Azad Khan and ask him for help. I did call him the same day and his willing to help me.

By end of the year 2005, I got it through. I was so happy. This is the chance for me to prove to myself. Nevertheless, it wasn’t an offered for Faculty of Artistic and Creative Art but it was an offered for Faculty of Communication and Media Studies. Anyway, I’m grateful. There started my campus life at UiTM which I was dreamed to be in. I had placed at Puncak Perdana Campus in Puncak Alam. Three years was a wondrous and memorable moment I had in Shah Alam and next 6 months in Lendu, where I had finished my part 7 because in part 6, I had applied for study leave. Now I had finished my diploma just wait up for graduation day.

At UiTM, I developed that I was good in designing, filmmaking and photographing. At UiTM I did entered traditional dance group, PESKA and gratefully with dancing I had been in Thailand and also not forget singing career still on the list. So, singing, dancing, acting, designing, writing, photographing and filmmaking are my interests that I am dying to do so and loving it so much instead the art and creative interests would be the side income for me. It is all about business now.

I have been dreamed to pursue every level of qualification started from SPM (which is compulsory), STPM and Diploma which I had reached it so far. In coming are bachelor degree, master and PhD. Insya Allah, if wanted by Him. But at this moment what I do is, I had joined a programme which is Tunas Mekar under UiTM – ICU which under Jabatan Perdana Menteri. It is a 1-year entrepreneurship programme for those who wanted to set up a business after graduated from any education institutional.

I had selected and now I have been working in one of the SME business in PD that specialty in wellness product and consultancy. Before I entered Tunas Mekar I am interested so much in Event Management business. The company hired me because they wanted to do event management. However because of some issues, I got problem with the company and don’t know my position at this time.

Anyway, I didn’t find the happiness and enjoyment in what I have been doing right now. I am planning to continue Tunas Mekar and change the company for the programme and really wanted to build up my own businesses but also wanted to pursue my bachelor degree in PR and last night I was realized that I wanted to quit from Tunas Mekar and working at the place that I am dying to be, Leo Burnet Kuala Lumpur. I know it is impossible but it still got chance if I try it out. We don’t know, right?

I am in a dreams dilemma right now. Either keep doing Tunas Mekar, building up my own businesses that start with JemputJemput Restaurant, pursuing part time bachelor degree in PR by end of this year and also continuing do my interest which is art and creative. Or quit from Tunas Mekar and working at Leo Burnett Kuala Lumpur (if got-lah), if not I will working at school as a teacher, still try building up my own businesses, pursuing my bachelor degree
and also continuing do my interest which is art and creative. Or leave everything behind and pursuing bachelor degree in Advertising or PR and never look back.